So this is an entertaining video in which trans man Chase (who seems to have either ADHD or a caffeine addiction) teaches trans men (aka females with dysphoria) how to masturbate. It begins, as all trans videos begin, with a list of trigger warnings. This video might trigger you because of GENITALS and MASTURBATION, very scary topics indeed! (At least he* said “genitals.” Usually they say “junk,” because even the word “genitals” is too anatomically correct to be acceptable by the trans cult.)
The first thing Chase talks about, after giving a second round of trigger warnings because OMG GENITALS, is how people with dysphoria are not expected to enjoy masturbation. Legit topic! I would think that there are a few people out there with dysphoria who can’t relate to their genitals in any way, or who have anxiety about the way they relate to their genitals. I read a post by a detransitioner once saying that she used to analyze the gendered implications of her movements while she was masturbating, which made it hard to get anywhere. Man, scrutinizing all your movements in case they have implications for your “gender” would be a real mood killer. That would kill my mood too, if I did that.
I told you I’d be giving out TERFy advice during this series on FtM videos. Here is my first bit of excellent TERFy advice: Don’t scrutinize the gendered implications of your movements while you’re masturbating. It turns out that your biological sex isn’t actually determined by whether you “thrust” or “wiggle” during your solo sexytimes. Your sex is determined by whether your body produces ova or sperm, which is something that you cannot change, regardless of what wanking technique you use!
Gender is not the same thing as sex. Your “gender” is whether you perform masculinity or femininity, as determined by a sexist patriarchal culture. Some more TERFy advice: you can perform either masculinity or femininity, or any variation of those two constructs, and still be female! It turns out that females can have any behaviour, mannerisms, personalities, interests, or wanking techniques they want, and still be female! So it truly doesn’t do any good to analyze whether you enjoy thrusting or not during your sexytimes, whether alone or with a partner, because either way, you are still a perfectly normal female.
Chase says that he used to think that if he enjoyed his body and felt horny, then he wasn’t really trans, because a trans person shouldn’t be feeling good about his body. Luckily, he has already stopped feeling that way. You are allowed to enjoy your body at any time, whether you are identifying as trans or not, and regardless of what kind of outfit and haircut you currently have, and whether your personality is considered “masculine” or “feminine.” Chase and I agree on that point.
When he starts talking about techniques to use to masturbate while dysphoric, 100% of his advice is that you should buy sex toys. If you guessed that he has a product deal with a company that makes sex toys, and that they give him free samples to review on his video channel, and that he gets paid a commission if someone clicks on the link to their site and buys a product, then you guessed right! It looks like advice for FtMs on how to masturbate is largely based on what capitalism wants to sell to them. This is totally a liberation movement, though. Liberation movements are all about what capitalism wants to sell to people who are suffering!
Moving right along. The first product that Chase (doesn’t) recommend is a three-in-one packer, pee-er, and sexer, which he says doesn’t work very well and is quite expensive! Well, awesome advice then! 😀 (In case you can’t understand trans speak, a packer, pee-er and sexer is a fake penis which you can wear around, pee through, or use as a dildo with a presumably female partner.)
Well okay, he only says it doesn’t work well as a pee-er or a sexer. He does think it works as a masturbator though. And here’s what I learned about FtM masturbation—are you ready for this? You take a fake penis, you put it against your actual genitals, and you jerk off the fake penis as the toy stimulates your actual genitals. That way you get sexual pleasure while pretending that what you’re touching is your penis! I find this very amusing. It’s not inherently wrong to use a fake penis to stimulate your clitoris, whatever floats your boat, it’s not hurting anybody. But at some point don’t you want to consider the fact that your actual sexual pleasure is coming from that horrifying organ that causes so much TRIGGERING, the clitoris? *gasp* Like, your pleasure is coming from an organ you supposedly don’t want to have? And doesn’t it occur to you at some point or another that the wonderful feelings you get from your clitoris are actually a reason to value having one?
So there is another gadget you can buy, called the “bro sleeve,” and luckily this one is cheaper and works better, and it’s a little flexible jelly cylinder that is sort of like a mini-fleshlight. It’s made to fit a mini-penis (aka enlarged clitoris). You just shove your
clit “dick” in there (it would be easier after testosterone has enlarged it) and then you can jerk off your “bro-sleeve” with your clit “dick” inside! What a neat trick!
He says the obligatory sex-pozzie line that “anything you like is okay,” and then he gives some silly examples of things you might like that are okay. One of them is “some people might be into pissing all over each other.” I think he was trying to be funny—Chase is a rather funny person and I think this was meant for comedy value. But I have to tell you about a hilarious moment I had today where the YouTube video was paused just at that moment, and I woke up my computer from its screen saver, and the moment it woke up it immediately played Chase’s line “some people might be into pissing all over each other.” I laughed so hard OMG.
Chase is kind enough to realize that not everyone has money to order sex toys off the Internet, so he mentions that you can also make a DIY fleshlight using a condom and a water bottle. I’m trying to picture someone doing this, and I just can’t picture it. Would you really rather make a contraption out of household objects when you could just use your hand? I’m telling you, I am WAY too lazy to be an FtM. I just want to rub one out and be done with it without having to do any arts and crafts projects first.
So here is even more TERFy advice, for the lazy FtM who doesn’t want to purchase or build any contraptions to masturbate with. Just fucking use your hand! Use your imagination to pretend you have a penis! And enjoy the feeling you get from your CLITORIS while you are pretending you have a penis!
A lot of these FtMs are attracted to women, and since I am an Evil Transphobe who understands what biological sex is, I have to note that FtMs are female. Old-fashioned second wavers like me tend to refer to females who are attracted to females by an old-fashioned word called lesbian. It turns out that it’s totally normal for lesbians to imagine themselves penetrating another female—that’s one of the things that you enjoy thinking about (and doing) when you’re a female homosexual. (I have written more about this here.) And by the way, you can do that without a penis! Lesbians already have everything they need for lesbians sex on their bodies. The Goddess knew what she was doing when she made lesbians.
Chase is so very kind. At the end of his video he says he hopes no one was triggered. They really are careful about the triggering in the trans cult. I hope they don’t notice the vulva cookies in my last post. (Or if they do, they can just call them “junk” cookies, or “little dick” cookies, and then they won’t be triggering.)
*I have used male pronouns for a trans man. Usually I go full-on MISGENDERING and use someone’s birth sex, but Chase passes so well as male that it feels weird to say “she.”