I was browsing through those endless flags for every possible Special Snowflake orientation, and I found this gem:
One of them is “autosexual.” I’m glad I found out that this is a real sexual orientation, because I’ve long suspected it to be so. According to Urban Dictionary, autosexual is defined as:
“sexual orientation toward oneself; that is, preferring self-gratification over other forms of sexual activity. Often occurs as a result of numerous failed attempts at interpersonal relationships, leading the individual to make a conscious choice to become autosexual rather than face disappointment and frustration yet again.”
I’ve totally run into guys like this so many times. You know those guys who are really into having orgasms and are supposedly straight but can’t stand interacting with human females? Guys who claim to be attracted to women and yet hate female bodies? Those guys.
It’s legit. They’re proud wankers, and they have a flag. Congratulations, dudes!